Question: Why do the ants think they can leave their carcasses in one corner of my bathroom?
Universe: They leave their carcasses in the middle of the bathroom too, but you walk on those and move them around the rest of the house corners.
Question: Why does peanut butter have to taste so good with chocolate?
Universe: And bananas. You forgot about bananas.
Question: Why does my daughter eat random nastiness off the floor or in the windowsill but refuses to touch my vegan mac and cheese?
Universe: I don't think you really are ready to hear that answer.
Question: Why do parents expect teachers to do the same amount of work for a lot less money?
Universe: Sucks for you.
Question: Why do I even look at Reader's Digest?
Universe: Reader's Digest is anti-time. It sucks the life out of anything it touches.
Question: Why do I even bother scrubbing the floor?
Universe: Because 15 minutes of clean floor feels sooooooooo good.